Slipping out of the gyroscope

For years, I lived in a state of incredible darkness. While the world spun madly on, I sat idly in my place. In truth, I think that, subconsciously, I wanted to leap into the same currents that pulled everyone around me forward. Yet outwardly, I remained bullheaded, denied the changes around me, and secured my place in the world. I was falling behind, and it seemed unlikely that I would ever catch up.

Years passed, and that current sped up while the distance between it and me grew. My friends were already long gone by the time I lost my father in the shuffle. Suddenly, I was entirely alone. The time came to step into the light. I didn't need an intervention, I wasn't addicted to anything really nefarious. Yet reminders of my emptiness were everywhere, from the people I would pass on the streets to television and even to my work. Recovery took all the willpower and grit I could muster. The Earth moves in circles, but somehow always progresses. I had spun on an axis, foolishly hoping that someone, anyone would come to pull me out. On Friday, this all came to an end.

Striding boldly through Eddy St. Commons, head held high, I took one large step forward and into modernity: I purchased the brand-spankin'-new iPhone 4g. In 8-10 business days, I will finally enter the real world and leave the Dark Ages. My Motorola Razr, at one time the paragon of cellular technology, is outdated and, somehow, an embarrassment to all. Ironically, when I first got my Razr during my first year of college, I was already about 2 years behind the times. Oh yeah? Well not this time! This beauty is the Mt. Everest of cell phones [until a newer version comes out in, oh I don't know, 3 months probably]: we all want to say we own it, but few really do. No longer will I embarrass my friends! No longer will my 56 year old father know more about as well as possess far superior technology than I do! No longer will I stumble through text messages on a small, yet somehow clunky keypad! Huzzah!

So goes the story of how I crawled out of my cavern and assumed my place amongst the masses. I have a feeling that a good chunk of time will pass before I figure out the ins and outs of my new little status symbol, but I'll get there soon enough. In the meantime, I will continue to put up posts without the support of personal imagery. Yes, I do own a camera. However, it's a real piece of work, and it's not worth the hassle to burn through batteries to take a few quality pictures and slo-o-o-wly upload them onto my computer.

I'll meet you all on the other side, laughing all the way to the 21st century.